Here's a good excerpt from the first part of Gitomer's book:
Have you ever looked back at a decision you made and scolded yourself, almost punished yourself, for making the wrong decision or realizing you could have made a better decision?
Monday-morning quarterbacks are always correct. They see what could have been done or should have been done on Sunday, and talk about it on Monday as though they could have gone back to Sunday and done it themselves.
People who go back and chastise themselves, or second-guess themselves, for making a wrong decision continue to set themselves up for failure in future decisions simply because they don't trust themselves.
I maintain that your judgment should always be trusted and never be second-guessed. That doesn't mean you won't make errors. That's why they call it judgment.
But I'm challenging you to look at incorrect decisions as lessons, life's lessons.
Mistakes in judgement are the best teachers in the world, and if you choose to learn from them, then you will begin to trust yourself and understand that, correct or incorrect, you were decisive and moved on.
Oh, you may rely on others. Oh, you may be dependent on others. But reliance and dependence are mutually exclusive of trust.
In order to build trust and become a trusted advisor to others, you have to first trust yourself. This means you have to trust your thinking, your wisdom, your knowledge, your judgment, your instincts, your powers of observation,your powers of dedication, your ability to reason, and your ability to discern.
You must be decisive. Trusted people are not wishy-washy. Trusted people do not pass the buck. Trusted people are willing to bet on themselves. It's not "trust me." It's "trust yourself."